On friendship

16 Apr

“A day without a friend is like a pot without a single drop of honey left inside.”

~ Winnie the Pooh

I remember a conversation I had with my mom about friendship back when I was in high school, probably about 16 years ago or more. I was describing to her how my relationship with one of my friends had changed, and how it made me sad.

She sympathized with me and explained that as the years go by, my friendships will evolve. Some people would remain in our lives forever, and we would grow closer and closer. And others would slowly fade away, leaving only the memories behind to savor.

Looking back now, I can understand exactly what she was trying to teach me.

I have several friends – people I have known for fifteen or more years – who I don’t get a chance to see more than once a year if I’m lucky given the distance between us. The best man from our wedding and his wife are two of them. He had a work conference this week and so they came to visit and stay with us this past weekend so that we could catch up and visit with each other. We hadn’t yet been able to meet each other’s youngest, and our two older ones had only ever met once before that.

The beautiful thing about our friendship with them is that it’s easy. We can come together after not having seen each other in a few years, and it’s like we haven’t skipped a beat.

Those are the absolute best friendships to have, in my opinion.

We talked and laughed and reminisced. Took hundreds of pictures and stayed up late playing board games. Our daughter was smitten with our friend and would walk over to him with her head back and arms lifted high up towards his head to be picked up. She doesn’t do this to anyone other than me or my husband. We hung out on the deck and had drinks and dinner. We threw all four kids in the big tub and watched them splash around in the bubbles, smiles all around. We shared little stories about them, our favorite iphone/ipad apps, and had lots of quality playtime.

In short, it was the best weekend ever.

We’re both celebrating ten years of marriage next year. The guys were each other’s best man. To honor this milestone, they invited us to join them on a vacation sometime in the Spring of 2013. Adults-only. The kiddos will get some quality time with the grandparents. {get excited, grandparents} Oh yeah. We’re in.

We’re so in.

And although we may not get the chance to get together again before then, it won’t make a difference. We’ll pick back up right where we left off.

Because that’s what great friends do.


“Friends are the most important part of your life. Treasure the tears, treasure the laughter, but most importantly, treasure the memories.”
– Dave Brenner


7 Responses to “On friendship”

  1. WalkingwithBullu April 17, 2012 at 2:54 pm #

    Great post!! I can relate having moved to different cities and countries in the past few years there are more than a few friends who i have lost and who still continue to be my best friends. Thanks for sharing!

    • BipolarMomLife April 17, 2012 at 3:00 pm #

      Thanks Bullu! Ironically, the friends that were visiting actually live in Houston. Small world! :) Thank you for commenting.

      • WalkingwithBullu April 17, 2012 at 3:02 pm #

        It is indeed!! You are most welcome :)

  2. Kimberly M (@momgosomething) April 17, 2012 at 9:38 am #

    I only have a few friends that stuck it with me after highschool and college. I keep those really near and dear to my heart. My dad would say things too like “You probably won’t have these friends your entire life.” It pissed me off. But he was right.
    Hang on to those girls :) and I don’t mean boobs.

    • BipolarMomLife April 17, 2012 at 1:39 pm #

      Yes. My mom said the same thing too – “you probably won’t have the same friends your entire life.” At the time I didn’t believe her, or didn’t want to believe her. But now, as I realize how much people change over the years, I recognize that she was right. As we change, our friends change to fit us, I think.

      And yeah, I have a few of those girls that I’d like to hang onto forever. Hopefully if we don’t change too much. :)

  3. Mountain Missy April 16, 2012 at 4:48 pm #

    This post was so very touching. I have had very few close personal relationships in my life, I think due to my bipolar disorder but the close friends I do have are the ones you’ve described so beautifully. Years can go by and I still pick up right where I left off with these people. Those are the best friendships, I do agree!!

    • BipolarMomLife April 17, 2012 at 1:36 pm #

      Thank you Missy! I can sympathize. I feel like my best friends are the ones who are comfortable with hearing me talk about my struggles with bipolar disorder. They may not all live next door, but when you can reconnect so easily when you do have the chance to spend time together, it’s almost just as good as living close. Almost.

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