Thoughts for a friend getting help

23 Oct

I “met” Kim of Make Mommy Go Something Something online in the months following the launch of my blog. She had several years of experience under her belt, so I reached out to her for help and she responded immediately. We began chatting over email and even talked via Facetime a few times. Kim, like me, also has bipolar disorder. But hers is Bipolar II while mine is Bipolar I, meaning her moods tend to swing to the lower end of the spectrum and mine are the opposite – I tend to have higher mood swings to the extent of becoming manic if I do not get enough sleep. We connected right away, both being young moms who enjoyed blogging about the struggles we faced with our condition, our kids, and our home life.

Kim is such a cool person. So funny, smart and kind. I started joining in on her Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturdays series, a fun link-up party on her blog that she created. With this part-time job (that I should be putting hours into right now, but I’m blogging instead – much more imortant right now than work, imo), I’ve lost touch with my friend. And I miss her.

She’s going through a lot right now. I know exactly what she’s going through and it’s gut-wrenching.

Reading that she recently entered the hospital to get help for the deep depression, suicidal thoughts, and anxiety she’s been battling of late takes me back to my last two hospitalizations. My heart breaks for her, but at the same time, I’m so incredibly proud of her for seeking the help that she knows in her own heart that she needs to get well. To be there for her husband and son. To feel human again.

I was there too. Those times were the lowest lows of my life. I missed out on almost two full week’s of my son’s life because I was so sick I needed medical intervention to bring me back to reality. And although I may not have wanted to go at the time, being forced into going to the hospital was just what I needed to re-start my life.

I got do-overs. I learned how to take care of myself so that I hopefully won’t have to go back to the hospital again. But, in the end, if I do have to go back at some point, I know from experience that it’s not the end of the world. It’s so that I can get well. And getting well and staying well are the most important things when you’re living with a mental illness.

Kim will get there. She’s getting her do-over right now. And I know in time she’ll be well because she’s doing what she needs to do, however hard it might be right now.

She inspires me. Not only her writing, but her personality and her sheer determination. She’s a true warrior.

Get well, my friend. Miss you and thinking of you every day. Sending love and hugs via the interwebs.



4 Responses to “Thoughts for a friend getting help”

  1. Masala Chica October 23, 2012 at 10:23 pm #

    I have been through my own shit. I am not bi-polar, but have dealt with many years of debilitating depression. What I can say is that I hope your friend knows she has people who love her and gets through this knowing that she has support of people who just want to see her be, you know. WELL. And as for you, it takes great bravery to be as honest as you are about your past experiences. While there is nothing to be ashamed about in speaking about mental “wellness” (i refuse to say mental illness, because that’s just stupid), there are still stigmas that need to be addressed and it’s hard to be brave enough to break through those.

    Sending strength to your friend. And i am so glad you and your family are together and better.

    Hard stuff, honey. But glad you got to the other side.

    • BipolarMomLife October 24, 2012 at 1:15 pm #

      Thank you so much, Kiran. Your words mean so much to me. I love how you say “mental wellness” and hope you don’t mind if I adopt that term from now on. You have such wisdom that you share. I appreciate your insights more than you know.

  2. Tina October 23, 2012 at 2:13 pm #

    You said everything I have been wanting to say and so eliquently. Thank you for that. I, too, missed out on about 3 weeks of my son’s life. I know it was the best thing that could have happened because I AM HERE for so many more precious moments. Thank God for that and for you.

    • BipolarMomLife October 23, 2012 at 2:20 pm #

      Thank you so much, Tina. You are so right – it was the best thing that needed to happen to us, and it did. Hugs. xo

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