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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

23 Jun

I am, quite easily, the world’s worst cook. And yet, I still try my darndest to do it because I’m a little embarrassed that my husband is ten million times better in the kitchen than I am.

Case in point: yesterday morning I went along my happy way, despite the fact that Little Man had woken me up at 5:45AM, looking up a recipe online for a whole wheat pancake mix from scratch since we were out of my favorite 7-grain mix that I usually use. Found a perfectly good recipe and set off about the kitchen, gathering up the ingredients I needed which we happened to have on hand.

Maybe it was due to being up at the ass-crack of dawn, but I doubt that I would have followed the recipe correctly if it had been 7am versus 6am. It called for 6 cups of whole wheat flour, 2 Tbs baking powder, 2 Tbs baking soda, 2 tsp salt and 1/3 cup sugar. I decided to half the recipe, measuring out only 3 cups of flour. I was letting Little Man help with the measuring, and we followed the rest of the recipe to a T, unfortunately for us.

When I took a bite of the first pancake off the griddle, I immediately knew what we had done wrong. Oops. Even with the amount of sugar for the full recipe, the double baking soda and powder was apparent. Nothing quite like bitter tasting pancakes first thing in the morning to wake up your taste buds. Bleck!

Thank goodness I had added a decent-sized handful of dark chocolate chips to each one before I flipped them over. Otherwise, I would have had to throw out the whole batch of 4 gigantic cakes that we had cooked up. I added more flour to the mix that remained, so that the early morning cooking effort wasn’t completely wasted.

My cooking tip of the day: chocolate just makes everything better. No matter how bad of a cook you may be. ;)

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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday: I love pinning

2 Jun

I freaking love Pinterest.

Oh, Pinterest. Let me count the ways.

First off, it is my number one method for boredom busting. Not that I have much free time on my hands to actually be bored. It’s just that sometimes, I happen to enjoy browsing around on Pinterest for neat ideas that I wouldn’t have found if I were just sitting around reading a book, for example.

I mean, can you imagine?

I also love Pinterest because it is inspiring. I’ve found a ton of cool {and free!} sewing patterns and projects ~ a few of which I’ve actually used to make gifts for friends {and stuff for myself, too}. I’m a novice sewer, but when I’m in the mood to sew up something fun, I just look at my Sewing Projects board to find some inspiration and then I’m off! Ten hours later I’ve usually been able to create something with a slight resemblance to the project I pinned.

I heart Pinterest because it helps me stay motivated and on track with my fitness and healthy eating goals. Now, I know what you’re thinking. There are TONS and TONS of chocolate and various other dessert recipes floating around on Pinterest. You’re right. There are. And back when I first joined the site, I totally fell into the trap of trying out all the recipes of those incredibly mouth-watering desserts in the photos. But you know what? After I stuffed one too many single-serve chocolate cakes into my mouth, I looked at my reflection in the mirror one day and realized I wasn’t happy with how I looked. So from then on, I made the decision to stop pinning {and baking} all those unhealthy desserts and snacks. I started to get myself back in shape and when I was craving something naughty, I’d search for healthy dessert recipes. And I found them. And tried them. And LOVE some of them. To keep myself from not getting bored with my workouts, I also search Pinterest for new exercises. There are tons of fitness blogs and healthy eating blogs out there and I have found some really awesome ones via pins.

It’s fun to stalk people via their Pinterest boards. It’s amazing to me that Pinterest, given how incredibly popular the site is, hasn’t created a setting so that a user can make a pin private. I recently noticed a girlfriend of mine through book club was pinning baby girl nursery ideas. She has a son a few months younger than mine, but no baby girl. I immediately wondered if she was expecting. Saw her about a month later and whaddya know, she was knocked up {but didn’t know the gender yet since it was way early, and wasn’t publicizing the news either}. Turns out she just learned that she is carrying a baby girl! YAY! So now she can put her pins to good use. Point of the story: don’t pin anything you wouldn’t want your friends to know or wonder about.

I sometimes get my Jesus on by reading a friend’s Quotes board. I’m not a highly religious person, but I do believe in God and Jesus and heaven. My friend is a Christian and her pins always make me feel so full of faith when I read them. I end up re-pinning so many of the things she pins there, I’m starting to think I should start a separate board on my wall for Faith Quotes.

If I ever need a unique gift idea ~ baby shower, wedding gift, housewarming gift, anniversary gift, birthday gift ~ any holiday, for that matter ~ I’ve been turning to Pinterest. One of the coolest ideas I’ve found {and cannot wait to try come August} is to tie a picture with a special recollection from your relationship to the ribbon on a helium balloon. Float the balloons in a room and surprise your loved one with a collection of memories that you can enjoy reliving for the occasion. Or, tie a love letter to each balloon, like this blogger did. Maybe I’ll save this idea and write my hubby a love letter for each month leading up to our 10th anniversary in 2013. In any regard, clever idea, huh?

So there you have it, folks. My confession of why I love Pinterest. Don’t get me wrong, there are some things I don’t like about this additional time-sucker of a web application, but I will say, I love way more things about it than I dislike.

Therefore, I will pin on. And on. And on. And on.


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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

12 May

I can totally relate to Kim’s confession today. Mine is similar. In honor of Mother’s Day tomorrow:

Six years ago I thought there was no way in hell I’d recover from the deep depression and crippling anxiety I was feeling, day after day, to start a family with my husband. Was ready to give up on the dream of being a mother because I thought I just couldn’t do it. I was too sick.

I am so thankful that I didn’t give up. I am so thankful that I fought like crazy, albeit not without many tears and mopey naps on the couch, but I battled my illness for a good year and a half until I was able to slowly and steadily climb out of the trenches to realize that there was hope. I am so thankful that my husband did not give up on me. I am so thankful that my family stuck by me and was there to listen to me cry when I needed to {which was pretty much daily}. I am so thankful that my doctors were able to figure out the best medication to get me back to my normal. I am so thankful that my friends did not turn their backs on me when they found out I was suffering from a mental illness. I am so thankful that I was able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Because if I wouldn’t have been able to, I wouldn’t have been able to see this:

My little blogger-in-training. :)

But seriously, my kids are the single BEST thing that has ever happened to me {aside from marrying the love of my life, of course}. These kids make me laugh {constantly}, challenge me {hello, potty-training, anyone?}, and push me to become a better person because I want them to look up to me. I sometimes have to stop and stare at them. I think to myself, “Wow. This little incredible person is half me and half my husband, and together, we made him and her. We made these little miracles. Just, WOW.”

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day and Postpartum Progress will be featuring a letter an hour, for all 24 hours of Mother’s Day, written by moms. It is, as Katherine Stone, the rally’s creator, put it: “a 24-hour celebration of the importance of emotional health for new mothers on Mother’s Day.” And I am honored to be a part of this fantastic online support network. And I really hope you stop by tomorrow to read.

Happy Mother’s Day {a day early}! I hope you, like me, will celebrate all. weekend. long. We deserve it.

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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

28 Apr

I sometimes often wish I could go back to work. Full-time. 

I can barely remember what it’s like to work full-time. I can imagine it’s a little like staring at a computer screen for 6-7 hours a day, and conversing with co-workers for the other hour or two. Throw in some meetings and conference calls, Excel spreadsheets and PowerPoint presentations, and that probably sums it up. But all I can think about is the quiet, alone time I would have where I could actually hear myself think. The time in the car commuting to the office would be nice. And the lunches. Those glorious lunch hours – either by myself or with colleagues – they would be the perfect way to break up the work day and I would totally enjoy them.

A wave of jealousy washes over me when my husband calls from work to tell me he has to travel. Why can’t I ever have five days to myself? Five whole days without the responsibility of making and serving three meals plus two snacks a day, changing diapers and Pull-ups, driving the kids to and from swim class and preschool, tripping over countless toys left strewn about the house, and refereeing various squabbles over stolen puzzles/books/younameittheyfightoverit. Five days to read books in my down time, enjoy eating out in restaurants, and even exercise at the hotel gym if I wanted to. Sounds heavenly to me.

Don’t get me wrong, when he announces he has a business trip coming up, I am not shy about laying on the guilt trip. I take full advantage of the days leading up to his trip, leaving him with the kids for “quality time” while I get a pedicure, go on a long run, or take a few hours to do some window {or actual} shopping for myself. It’s my way of preparing myself for the days and nights of exhaustion that I will most eloquently endure solo.

And we survive. Somehow, we make it through the week without Daddy. It helps that I have close friends and my in-laws close by, and they usually  offer to help when they know I’m on my own. I seriously do not know how single parents do it. I have a huge amount of respect for them – it’s hard work raising kids on your own.

When he gets back we have a happy reunion full of lots of hugs and kisses. We hear about the latest city he’s visited, he doles out souvenirs to the kids, and I promptly sneak out the laundry room door to the nearest coffee shop with my library book in hand so that I can recover from the week’s escapades over a nice warm cuppa.

I’ve gotta get my me-time, or I would not survive as a Mommy. Plain and simple.

Sending love and prayers to Kim for a speedy recovery from gallbladder surgery. Glad that sucker is finally gone! xoxo

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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

21 Apr

I’m pretty sure my sucky methods of potty training are going to force my son into therapy.

Back when we decided he was “ready” to be potty-trained, we took the week during Thanksgiving vacation to stay home, put him in underpants and take him to the potty on 30-minute increments after coaxing him to drink lots of water and eat more fruits and veggies. I thought for sure it was going to be months and months of cleaning up poppy underpants and washing tons of urine-soaked pants. I was pleasantly surprised. There were stickers and celebrations every time he pooped on the potty. I even pulled out a wrapped gift leftover from Christmas the first time he dropped a deuce in his little boy potty.

In one week he went from ten accidents a day to going consistently on the potty day after day.

I rejoiced! I felt free! We could go on outings during the day and I only had to worry about changing one diaper instead of two!

{I may have bragged a teeny bit on Facebook.}

Wow. How things can change in a few months. He did so well from December to the beginning of April. Today? He refuses to poo on the potty. And I can tell when he’s holding it in – he gets this “deer in the headlights” look on his face and I just know. His belly gets so distended after not having taken a dump for five days that we end up having to give him Miralax or a glycerin suppository to help him get it out. I push water daily and he is good at eating fruits and vegetables, even though he’s become a bit of a picky eater lately.

I tell him to go use the potty when I notice him holding it in. He refuses. I carry him kicking and screaming to the potty. I demand he does his business on the potty and to not come out until he does. I yell. It makes me so sad after I do, but I can’t take it back.

{Loud crying screams go on for 10 minutes behind the closed bathroom door.}

I have reverted back to Pull-ups because I am so sick of cleaning poopy underpants. I am so sick of potty training drama, I can’t stand it.

So yeah, that’s my Secret Mommy-hood Confession for today. Sorry for so many mentions of poop.

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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

7 Apr

I still sleep with a stuffed animal.

My husband gave it to me as a joke back when we were dating in college. Almost 12 years ago.

And I have slept with it every. single. night. since then. I would even pack him on vacations.

It was obvious I was extremely attached to this soft, cuddly bunny with the velvet nose. {the velvet is long gone now, but he’s still cute.}

About a week ago, we pulled the two kiddos into our bed on a weekend morning at the crack of dawn to snuggle as a family for a few minutes. My son saw my stuffed bunny and said, “Mommy has a sleepy bunny, too!”. That’s when my husband said that he thought it was about time for me to hand him down to the kids.

Maybe the bunny’s the one responsible for our dwindling sex life?

Nah, I blame the exhaustion from running after two toddlers every day. Either that, or my addiction to blogs, Twitter, and Instagram lately.

But I digress.

So last night when I was putting the little man down for bed, I grabbed my stuffed bunny and handed him over.

Kinda cute that it’s also Easter weekend too, huh? :)

This morning my baby woke up with his two bunnies in hand.

And last night, I didn’t miss him. :)

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Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday

31 Mar

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I haven’t seen my therapist in probably nine months or more.

Husband took a new job {yay, nice pay jump! shorter commute!} back in June of last year, and when our health insurance benefits changed, I got lazy about looking into the coverage we had for therapy. Plus, I have been doing great, so I didn’t think we needed to shell out the moo-lah just for me to sit and talk about myself for 45 minutes every month.

But, I secretly miss it.

I enjoy talking about myself. {does this make me a shallow person? God, I hope not. I like to listen to other people talk about themselves too. This is why I am a blog addict.} And I think it’s fun to bounce ideas off my therapist. I had dinner with a friend of mine earlier this week and felt so bad afterwards because I basically chewed her ear off for almost three hours. {Note to self: need to work on being a better listener. friends are not a substitute for a therapist.} Hence, I have realized that maybe I should make that therapy appointment so that I don’t wear my friend’s ears out.

And so, I am going to call my therapist’s office first thing Monday morning to get an appointment. Who-hoo!! I’m excited about therapy! (As an added bonus, she gives a good hug at the end of each visit. She’s sweet like that.)

Oh, and I’m also excited that this is my first link-up with Kim. She rocks. I *heart* her. Read her blog. This gal has a way with words. Plus, she’s freaking hilarious.

Happy weekend everyone!

{Husband graciously took the kids to their favorite nearby farm to see the animals so that I could write in a quiet house this morning.  He texted me this picture. I love him to pieces.}
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